Why Men Suck
Uncle Andrew
I’ve been DVRing a lot of Spike TV recently (speaking of which, anyone interested in buying a freshly-factory-reconditioned Toshiba RD-XS34 DVR/DVD Recorder? Just got it back from warranty repair but I upgraded to the new model in the interim. Lemme know.), because they’ve been running back episodes of The Shield, a program I like very much. I may, however, have to buy the shows on DVD, because I just can’t stand much more of Spike TV. It’s not really the programs they play so much as the advertising. And really really, it’s not the advertisements themselves that I can’t bear, so much as the thought that the folks at Spike might lump me in demographically with the kind of person who would enjoy and be afftected by them.
“Say, Andrew, would you happen to have a particular example in mind?” Why yes, Billy, I would, thanks for asking! And here it is! (Requires Apple’s free Quicktime Player to view.)
Note: This movie is safe for work—barely—but you may not want others to see you watching it. Really, just that caveat alone probably gives you a decent mental picture of the content. No real reason to watch it at all.
Shawn thinks that the ad is supposed to be—ahem—”tongue in cheek”. Me, I think it’s a serious ad posing as a sarcastic ad posing as a serious ad. As in, “Ha ha, check this out, we made an ad that makes you think we really think women act this way, ha ha, gotcha….um, but, really, you know, maybe she really does get this hot and bothered over a soda, you think? HAA HAAAAA, gotcha again, boy are you a sucker….no, really, you think? Maybe?”
I can’t decide whether to claw out my eyes or rip off my nads. Probably safer to just buy the DVDs.
7 Responses to “Why Men Suck”
Leave a Reply
All comments containing hyperlinks are held for approval, so don't worry if your comment doesn't show up immediately. (I'm not editing for content, just weeding out the more obvious comment spam.)
All portions of this site are © Andrew Lenzer, all rights reserved, unless otherwise noted.
June 27th, 2006 at 7:12 pm
Well, Andrew, first let me complement you on your good taste….first, in barfing at the ad, but second in liking the Shield. I watch it on FX, where I also get Rescue Me….which seems to be going a little (nay, a lot) over board this season with it’s really gross sexuality, though the interaction of the firepersons is often fun to watch. Last season had some genuinely fine human interest episodes. But since I am now in the TV reviewing mode, any comments on The Closer? There’s absolutely nothing, and I mean nothing, to watch this summer on Broadcast TV – except PBS, of course – so thank you Rupert Murdock & Co, for All You Do for Cable TV. If it weren’t for you, I’d have to read a book.
June 28th, 2006 at 9:40 am
OH MY GOD! I just drank some of that and the same thing happened! My only complaint is, now that Im done with my sexy dance, those hot pants are chafing me. MMMMM drink it.
June 28th, 2006 at 9:51 am
Yep, that settles it; I’m definitely clawing my eyes out. 😯
June 30th, 2006 at 7:57 am
Save your bandwidth, you can watch the full version on their dime here. They are the “official energy drink of the UFC”, which fully explains the video: they are marketing to the lowest grade of knuckle-dragging mouth breathers available.
June 30th, 2006 at 8:28 am
Yeh, I thought that was just too perfect myself. Women as visualized by men with more abdominal muscle sub-groups than teeth. Or brain cells.
July 1st, 2006 at 10:54 pm
Clearly I’m not in the target audience either…. whats a “UFC” when its at home?
July 3rd, 2006 at 7:43 am
Znerf? Not quite sure what you mean. Is this some sort of play on words, like “Can a UFC without its glasses”?